The Time Warp

Last night I was talking to my mom about where I would be this weekend.  Mama B likes to have the rundown of what city I’m in on what weekend b/c she’s a good mom like that.

I rattled off my whereabouts for the next  7 weekends before I realized “shit, I’m in June already.”

Someone needs to explain the summer time warp to me.  January alone takes about 5 months to get through but May-August?  You blow through those 4 months before you can even blink.

Is it because the warmer it gets the busier you get?  Is it because there are just more events in the summer?  I mean, we’ve got 5 holidays in that period: Mother’s Day, Memorial Day, Father’s Day, 4th of July, Labor Day.  Plus you add wedding season on to that?  And the chance for vacations and beach weekends? Before you know it, it’s September again; your summer Fridays are gone, and you’re staring winter in the face with the same enthusiasm as a teen with a zit on prom night.

Part of the problem, of course, is that people always assume that April/May are warm months.  They aren’t.  Think about it in terms of boiling water.  It takes quite a bit of time for the stove to heat up but it’s cold the whole time it’s heating.  Same as spring, people.  You’ve got to shake that winter chill and that takes some time.  Now, at the other end, it can be warm (unbearably so sometimes) until well into October.  Again, when the stove cools down it’s warm until the last second.  This is fall.

Here’s my suggestion: worldwide (in this hemisphere at least) we need to stop pretending that spring is warm and get it into our heads that spring is cold and fall is warm.  This will avoid all of the disappointments over the weather.  The severe hatred and death threats towards AccuWeather.  And this may help to adjust the time warp.

We’ll be able to space our months out a little better.  January will no longer seem to take 5 months to get through, the whole time detesting our winter clothes and dry hair/skin because we won’t have entered “the cold decline into winter” until November–2 months after we normally get into that mindset.  And at the same time, summer won’t seem to blow by before it’s even started b/c in April we’ll still know that we’ve got another 2 months until the warm weather is really around for good.

I don’t know, it’s just a thought.

But in the meantime, did you all get this* stuck in your heads b/c of me?

Then that’s all that really matters, isn’t it?


*I would have loved to have embedded the video, but, well, if it’s not YouTube, then I’m not going to figure it out, trust me, I tried.


10 thoughts on “The Time Warp

  1. i nominate you to lead this change.

    just like most things it all starts with retail. if retail actually had long sleeve shirts still on the racks in february and hadn’t started with t-shirts already things would be different. you can’t find a long sleeve shirt right now if you try. it’s all white and bright and springy. don’t get me wrong i love the spring clothes but it’s not warm enough to wear them. it blows.
    get started on that change, will you

  2. Um, it’s pretty warm here in NC… I actually spent my Easter sitting next to the pool, outside, drinking beer. Plenty of others spent their weekends outside tanning (us Casper-related folks can’t quite do that). Just throwing that out there.

    However, you’re right that months drag at first, then FLY by. My July is already booked solid. Completely. I’m also busy halfway into May with the prospect of a vacation in August. Oy. Where does the time go?

  3. Typographysnob: Oh, I’d be so okay with those numbers right about now!

    Narm: I’ll do my best, but since I’m participating in wedding season this year, I’m partial towards it.

    NSJ: I totally agree! I hate looking for cardigans in February and only finding those stupid featherweight ones. I’ll put in a word with my supervisors and see what we can do. After all, I’m a mover and shaker in the retail biz, right?

    MinD: Your comment would be stricken from the blog b/c I’ve been cold for the past few weeks and therefore hate you, but I’m keeping it here b/c A) we’re friends and B) this way other cold people can hate on you a little bit too. (No seriously, I love you lots!)

  4. This is so true! although this year time started flying for me at the beginning of March – I can’t believe its already the middle of April!

  5. Time, in general, is quickly getting away from me.

    It’s happened. I’ve become an adult. My mom told me it would happen.

    It seems like only yesterday I was saying, “My birthday is SoOoOoOoOoo FAR AWAaAaAaY!” Now…well, you know.



    That’s okay, it’s a good song.

    I’ve noticed the same thing – my weekends are just filling up one by one! I need to reserve one for myself.

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