…to my 97th birthday celebration.
What’s that? Did you not get the memo about me being seriously old?
Did you not read the post about the foot rest?
Did you skip the post about the acid reflux?
Well consider this the post about how I threw my back out. Again. For the second time in a month. I’m not joking. Let me repeat that:
I HAVE THROWN MY BACK OUT TWICE IN THE LAST MONTH.
I am 24 years old and I have thrown my back out twice in the last month. Oh sure, this isn’t the first time I’ve thrown my back out. I’ve thrown my back out at least 4 times. The first time I was around 13 years old. I almost always throw it out in pairs though. It’ll happen twice (occasionally it’ll happen more than twice) in the span of a few months and then I can go a few years without tossing anything out of whack. I am hoping that will be the case now.
Thing is though, I have to assume that there is something seriously wrong with this. My dentist told me I’m too young to be in such bad condition. My coworkers told me I’m too young to be in such bad condition. Boo even told me I’m too young to be in such bad condition.
Yes, everyone, I know that I’m too young to be in such bad condition. 24 is too young to have acid reflux. 24 is too young to seriously need an ergonomic foot rest. 24 is too young for me to be throwing my back out on a tri-weekly basis.
Which is why we’re going to celebrate my 97th birthday. We’re going to have some mushed up cake and prune juice and really go to town. And then we’ll call it a night around 7:30 b/c we must not exhaust the elderly. Can’t strain them. Can’t excite them.
And I think it’s pretty apparent that I’m not young. I always knew that my penchant for grandpa-cardigans had to mean something. And this? This perpetually ailing back? Well, I think this seals the deal.