Adventures in license renewal and other signs the DMV should be avoided

I had to get my license renewed.  Sure, I haven’t really driven a car in months, but there’s not a chance I’m letting my license expire.  Something tells me parallel parking won’t be the only problem I have if I have to retest.  I knew I wanted to renew at home–I’m just not ready to get rid of my PA license.  I also wasn’t ready to get rid of my picture.  I had a really awesome license picture.  I know, that’s pretty shallow, but it was a really good picture!  Plus, my passport picture…well…let’s just say that it’s a good thing I don’t leave the country very often.  So Boo and I headed to the DMV to renew my license:

10:45–We wanted to leave the house 45 minutes ago.  This is not starting out well.  My hair is flipping weirdly and it’s starting to snow.

11:10–I forget where we are going and miss the turn.  I was too focused on the mall trip afterward that I almost forgot about the DMV.

11:15–No one in the parking lot seems to have any idea what they are doing.  I managed to navigate the Duncan Manor intersection and these fools can’t get their vehicles inside the lines.

11:16–Enter the DMV.  Boo and I are both confused by the signage.  Feel stupid.

11:17–Pull a number after figuring out that we needed to pull a number.  Pull A50.  Worry when we realize that we are only on A33.

11:19–#34 is absolutely ready to pop out a baby at any second.

11:21–Check paperwork.  Ask DMV lady if I need to sign my paperwork on the signature line.  She says “Uh, not really.”  I’m barely even sure what that means–why put the line if I don’t actually have to sign anything?

11:24–There is a lot of beeping coming from somewhere in the room.  Boo is confused.

11:25–Call a “Lauren.”  I am hopeful even though I know there is no possible way they could mean me.

11:25:33–Am disappointed that I am not the “Lauren.”  Am happier that we are on #42.

11:27–Boo just now realizes that I am trying to look identical to my old, awesome photo–even after my hair meltdown.  He says I am ridiculous.  I agree, but that didn’t stop me from totally trying to copy my picture.

11:31–McLovin* walks in.  It’s awkward.

11:32–Someone calls DMV.  No one answers.  Someone else yells “DEAD NUMBER!!”  Boo decides someone killed #47

11:34–#50.  I scribble my signature on the electronic pad.  DMV lady asks if it’s okay.  I tell her it’s as good as it’s going to get.

11:34:47–I sit to take my picture.  The lady asks if I like it and I ask to take it again.  She tells me I can take a third.  I decide not to be that kid and go with my first picture.

11:36–Boo and I talk about all the photos I should have taken.  Decide I will do a photo montage of that for another blog post.


*In all fairness, it wasn’t the real McLovin–but he was a pretty close replica.


8 thoughts on “Adventures in license renewal and other signs the DMV should be avoided

  1. I had to renew this year (you have to at 25 in MN), and I was SO disappointed because my last picture (21-year old Lily) was SO cute. And my new one is not ok with me, but you have to take the picture FACING the line of all of the people and I didn’t like the feeling of them watching me retake pictures, so I just went with it. AH. Your account of this situation is so scarily accurate!

  2. Eek. I hate renewing. I had to do it when I got married. My photo and my old name were gone forever and all I have now is a picture of myself looking depressed, tired and fat from the honeymoon and a shaky signature on the back because I’d only practiced signing my new name a couple of times earlier…
    I could use a new photo and signature to renew (due next month) but the thought of lining up makes my stomach turn!

  3. I’ve been meaning to renew my licence for over a year and I’m nervous about it. I know it will be an ordeal because it was suspended (medical reasons) when it expired. Not to mention that I will probably need to travel across the city to do it! Augh!

  4. Boo: Don’t lie!

    lily: Oh man, if I’d been facing the line that picture ordeal would have been a lot more traumatic!

    kez: Haha yeah, the signature part tripped me up too–and it’s the same name I’ve had my whole life. I’m toast when that name changes….

    Meg: It’s such a bummer, right?

    Erica: All I can say is godspeed on that venture!

    Andy: I need to see Role Models. And thanks man! I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself over here :)

    Jamie: WOAH! That IS a miracle!

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