The one where Boo gets his watches back

Hey everyone, Boo is back and he’s got a fun customer service story for everyone! Let’s just say that the people who make watches for Guess aren’t the sharpest tools in the shed and the following story has taken place over the past 3 months.

To save everyone the details, my father bought me a Guess watch for Christmas about 2 years ago. The “sealed” case miraculously got condensation inside and eventually stopped working. So I went back to my dependable albeit worn-to-kingdom-come Fossil watch until I decided not to be lazy and send the watch back for repair. Before I could do that however, the Fossil died and I was watch-less. The girlfriend, knowing my despair, gave me my Christmas present early and got me a brand new beautiful Guess watch this past year for Christmas. I wore it every day, and I must tell you that I didn’t swim in it. I didn’t wear it in the shower. I WORE the watch. THAT’S IT! Well apparently Guess’ watch manufacturer must also make watches for Wal-Mart and third world countries, as the quality of the new watch also failed around the end of June when it started getting really hot. How? OH…CONDENSATION, the same problem as the first watch!!

Needless to say I wasn’t happy and I decided to send both watches back to the manufacturer with a kind, yet strongly worded, letter on how the watches succumbed to the same demise. The manufacturer is in Norwalk, CT which is a day’s shipment on UPS. I sent in the watches and I waited. Around July 22nd, I called up the manufacturer and asked what the status was on my repair/replacement. I was told that the watches were delivered on the 3rd of July. I did not receive this shipment. After a lot more BS I was told that they would put in a lost package claim.

When I called back 3 weeks ago customer service put me on hold, knowing nothing had been resolved and told me that 2 brand new watches would be sent to me. Last week, when these watches STILL hadn’t arrived, I called again and customer service assured me that it should be shipped by Friday. I spent the weekend with the Lauren in NYC and when I returned home there was no package. I decided that if they had not reached me by Monday then they would be getting a call (and possibly my foot up someone’s ass…).

Monday morning I got a voicemail from the front office saying that my neighbor in 337 had dropped off 2 packages in my name…(I’m in 2337…UPS apparently can’t read directions…TWICE). I called them and asked them if they were watches. He said “Well one box is two watches…the other is just the faces…” Gee thanks Guess…what the heck am I supposed to do with two faces?! (Face here refers to the case and movement, no bracelets to attach the casing to my wrist.) I want everyone to know that yes I realize my neighbor is weird for harboring a package for 2 months, but trust me this gets much better.

I immediately hang up and call Guess, after going through the normal identification nonsense, the following conversation ensued:

Boo: “Ok, so my neighbor received my packages. What do you want back?” (I’m an honest person.)

Customer Service Lady: “So you have 4 watches total then?”

Boo: “Well…no. You sent me 2 watches, and 2 faces of the watches, no bracelets. I imagine that the ones with the bracelets were the ones sent out to me recently.”

Customer Service Lady: “Oh probably. Just send those back.”

Boo: “So then I’m just left with the faces?”

Customer Service Lady: “Yes. Oh…wait…um…oh…”

Boo: “Those don’t really do me much good without bracelets…”

Customer Service Lady: “No..I guess not. Well…send us back the watches, and we will send you out bracelets for the other ones.”

Boo: “Um…I don’t necessarily have the tools to put those two together.” (I’m not a jeweler…)

Customer Service Lady: “Oh, yeah, I guess you wouldn’t…” (This is where it gets good people) “Well why don’t you send us all of the watches back, we will put the bracelets on for you, and then ship them back.”

At this point I’m dumbfounded. I don’t understand why I can’t just keep the ones with the bracelets and I barely have words.

Boo: “Couldn’t I just keep the ones with the bracelets and send the faces back? It seems like that would make much more sense and much less shipping hassle for both of us.”

Not So Bright Rep: “No I’m sorry, we can’t do that.”

Boo: “So I have to pay shipping on this too?”

Brain Dead Rep: “Yes. Well…if you put the receipt in the box we may be able to reimburse you.”

Boo: “Look this isn’t exactly my fault, in fact it’s not at all. I am doing the right thing in sending these back, but ok that’s fine. Are the faces new?”

Barely Breathing on Her Own Rep: “Yes.”

Boo: “And the watches are also new?”

Would be Dead if I Could Reach Through the Phone Rep: “Yes they are both new, not refurbished.”

Boo: “…Ok. Thanks.”

I hang up and think about it. I realize that there is no possible way that this makes any sense so I call back hoping to get someone with a little more intelligence than a post-it note:

Boo: “Hi, I just called about watches that got shipped to the wrong place.”

Customer Service Lady Number 2: “Yeah I think I heard about call, there aren’t too many of us here.”

Boo: “Ok great. Look here’s what I’m going to do, I’m going to send you back the faces, because they are just as good as the ones with the bracelets and because IT MAKES SENSE.”

Customer Service Lady 2: “Ok can you hold on a second?” ….hold….”Ok that will be fine.”

How was this simple process so difficult?!?! I don’t understand people at times, and the number of people in this world with the intelligence of a coat hanger never ceases to amaze me. When I returned home and retrieved the watches from the office there was an invoice in the box…Guess expects me to pay $7.50 for “Shipping and Handling”. I’m calling them today and telling them that since they and their courier (UPS…UPS for reference…are you taking notes? Ok good…UPS…) cannot ship a package to the same address not even 1 out of 2 times, they can shove the $7.50 up their ass. I had to pay to ship the watches back to them the first time, and then a second time.

I don’t plan to ever buy another Guess watch in my life considering this fiasco, and let it be a lesson: when dealing with Customer Service, no matter how bad it gets, it may turn out to be a really fun story in the end. Now if you excuse me, I have to some watches to set.

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7 thoughts on “The one where Boo gets his watches back

  1. @Matt- I know man, tell me about it! I should’ve done it, and I know that I shouldn’t have called them about it but hey, you never know.

  2. @Apollocreed – Well how would you like it if every time he ordered something from the Cave Shopping Network they couldn’t find his address?! Then he ‘s gotta go and pick it up, and wait in line. Heck I’d be upset too!

  3. @ Megakathleen – fortunately I was at work at the time, so I was in “professional mode” otherwise I probably wouldn’t have been so nice.

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