I’m having a hair crisis

Every day I wake up, shower, and attempt to tame the mass of hair on my head.  Leave-in conditioner, leave-in conditioner SPRAY, gel, smoothing serum.  Those of you with curls can relate.  Those of you with straight hair can just sit there quietly and stop basking in the ease of your morning ritual.


ARE you through?  MAY I continue now?


So like I said.  I am having a hair crisis. I have this constant inner battle.  Between my annoyance with growing my hair and my desire for it to be long.   I trim it, clean the ends up, get it all ready to grow.  Then, like clockwork, six weeks later I am itchy to do something to it.  Cut it.  Dye it.  Something.  But since I’m kind of in love with my color I always end up chopping it.

Another reason I usually spring for the cut is that I get frustrated by wearing my hair the same way EVERY SINGLE DAY!  Curly hair + humidity = frizz and poof.  Frizz and poof + workplace and sense of acting “professional” = faux hawk and (if not right away, definitely by lunch) ponytail.  Do you know boring that is?  Very boring.  Some mornings I even get up way early, plug in my curly iron and try to twist those little guys into something workable.

But I can’t do this every day.  I can’t live with the stress.  The frustration of a perfect hair day shot to shit the second I step outside.  So I made a decision.  I live in New York City dammit and I can find anyone to do anything I could ever need.  So I found a curl specific salon.  And I did it.  I booked an appointment.  I have a wedding to attend in a few weeks that also includes a weekend at the House of Boo (read: the boyfriend’s parents) so I need to spruce up a bit.

Then something happened.  The SAME thing that happens EVERY SINGLE TIME I book a hair appointment–even if I only just decide to book one and don’t actually get around to booking it.  My hair starts to behave.  It’s miraculous.  The curls are all uniform and perfect.  Any amount of product, even on days when I skimp, seems to be exactly the right amount.  And instead of fading and drooping halfway through the day, my curls stay bouncy and wonderful for the whole day.  It’s as if my hair KNOWS that a cut is imminent and it is trying to change my mind.

Don’t cut me Lauren, you’ll lose all this pretty curl.  Don’t cut me Lauren, you’ll regret it.

And now I’ve started to panic.  Maybe I will regret it, I think.  Maybe, instead of my curls just sproinging properly, they will ‘fro out to volumes never before seen, rendering all my product skills unusable and my appearance unmanageable.  Maybe they will cut layers so awkward that one bad weather day will have people thinking I previously resided in a trailer park in mid-Kentucky (read: mullet).

But I have to relax.  I have to remember that before Wednesday, when I finally booked this appointment, my hair was deserving of MANY a time out for its bad behavior.  And I have to trust that these people are professionals.  This isn’t Supercuts.  This is an entire salon devoted to curls.  And it’s in a city that attracts people from all over for it’s, well, skill with making people look good.

I have to relax.  I have to put down the gel and hand over the scissors.


14 thoughts on “I’m having a hair crisis

  1. Matt: Combine this with never having to wait in lines at public bathrooms and you guys really have it made, don’t you?

    Boo: You have hair issues too! I’m not the ONLY one!

  2. We are Hair Sisters! I have the same exact problem. I have a hair appt tomorrow and I do. not. know. what I am going to do. It’s TOMORROW! I have to have a plan in place and if it’s a bad hair day there is a chance I could leave with a shaved head and it it’s a good hair day I might just not show up. There is no knowing what will happen!

  3. I feel your pain.

    However, I am a firm believer that curly hair NEVER looks better than the week after it’s cut, depending on the length you go with.

    Choose wisely grasshoppa.

  4. Apollo: Before pics or after pics? I guess I do owe everyone a before/after, don’t I?

    Meg: Yay for being hair sisters! Good luck tomorrow and let me know what you go with because I’m still not sure what to do with my hair either!!

    Kristen: It’s like science or something.

    Heather: That’s a very good point. Also, I’m slightly terrified to cut now!!

  5. yeah my hair is a curly mess too, but i usually just keep it short. and when it gets too long i chop it even shorter than it was before, haha.

    aaaaand i use sebastian potion number nine, it works like magic to keep the curls tamed, i highly recommend it.

  6. Well, I am a straight haired person (sorry!) but I spend a lot of time trying to master the curling wand. What can I say? Grass is always greener…
    Good luck with your hair stylings! Be sure to post some pics :)

  7. Katelin: You’ve reassured me a bit about the short cut! Plus, I think I’m going to check out this sebastian potion number nine…I’m always looking for that one product that will do the trick!

    Apollo: Okay, before and after it is!

    Kez: The grass is always greener, isn’t it? But I guess that’s why Conair makes a living on curling irons and straighteners!! They should thank us for their Christmas bonuses…

  8. I didn’t do anything exciting…it was just like you said – by the time that I’d gotten to the salon (I rode the bus) I’d had three random people compliment my hair. So I just did different highlights and bangs.

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