Calling in humid

Dear Employer,

I am writing to let you know that I will not be making it into the office tonight. I am calling in humid.

The humidity for the past week has been, approximately, 179% Now, this is of course an exaggeration, but my hair seems to think it is an accurate depiction, thus the reason I will not be coming in to the office.

My hair has nearly doubled in size in the last few days and I can no longer contain it. I have curly hair, it happens, but I can no longer overlook the fact that people are concerned about my “recent electric shock.” That Albert-Einstein-forgot-my-comb look is out. To be fair, I’m not sure that it was ever in in my lifetime.

And so, since I am lacking an afro pick and flowered dress, I am calling in humid. The air is hot, the office is cold, and Pippi Longstocking braids are not on the dress code.

Thanks for understanding. I’ll be back when the rain subsides.

Lauren

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